96-Year-Old Reveals Her Secret to a Vibrant Life—Start Today

Embracing a Fulfilling Life in Later Years

At 96 years old, Betty Parker has grown tired of hearing about the aches and pains that come with aging. Instead, she focuses on the positive aspects of her life, filling her journal with stories of picking roses from her garden, reading, playing cards with friends, and baking pies when she entertains. While she admits that baking might not be as easy these days, she finds joy in the activities she still enjoys.

Parker’s experience highlights a broader truth: many people, regardless of age, struggle with feelings of loneliness and disconnection. However, maintaining a sense of purpose and connection can significantly enhance the quality of life in older years. According to Dr. Kerry Burnight, a gerontologist based in California and Parker’s daughter, factors like social interaction and mental engagement play a crucial role in living longer and more fulfilling lives.

Gerontologists study the biological, social, and psychological aspects of aging, while geriatricians focus on the medical care of older adults. Together, they emphasize that longevity is not just about living longer but about living well. Dr. John Batsis, a geriatrician and associate professor at UNC’s School of Medicine, notes that while life expectancy has improved over the generations, it’s essential to ensure that those extra years are filled with meaning and joy.

Starting Early or Late: The Importance of Planning

It’s never too early or too late to start building a life you enjoy. For those still working, planning for retirement can help ease the transition. Batsis explains that the “retirement cliff” can be challenging for individuals who have spent their lives in the workforce. Suddenly losing a daily routine and sense of purpose can be difficult. To avoid this, he recommends starting to explore hobbies and interests that you’d like to pursue in retirement while you’re still working.

For those who have already retired, there are plenty of opportunities to discover new passions. Whether it’s writing a book, learning a musical instrument, or taking up a new sport, it’s never too late to try something new. Burnight, author of the upcoming book Joyspan: The Art and Science of Thriving in Life’s Second Half, emphasizes that now is the perfect time to redefine your life and embrace new experiences.

Keeping Your Mind and Body Active

Engaging in mentally stimulating activities is key to staying cognitively sharp. Burnight suggests that doing challenging tasks, such as learning a new skill or taking on a complex hobby, can activate neuroplasticity—the brain’s ability to grow and adapt. This kind of mental exercise helps maintain cognitive function and enhances overall enjoyment in later years.

Physical activity is equally important. Batsis advises finding hobbies that keep you active, as inactivity can lead to a decline in mobility and independence. However, it’s crucial to choose activities that you genuinely enjoy rather than forcing yourself into ones you think you should do. If you’ve never liked books, for example, becoming a reader in retirement may not be motivating. The key is to find something that resonates with you.

Building a Diverse Social Network

Social connections play a vital role in emotional well-being. Parker, for instance, meets regularly with a group of women in their 60s, whom she calls “the youngs.” Though younger than her, they provide a diverse social circle that helps combat isolation. Burnight encourages people to diversify their social networks by connecting with friends of different ages, neighbors, and people from their past.

Using social media to reconnect with old friends or making small interactions with neighbors can also lead to meaningful relationships. Burnight stresses the importance of being proactive in maintaining these connections. She says, “You need to be the one to call to make a plan or to remember a birthday, or to sit by somebody’s hospital bed or to drive them to their chemo.”

Adapting and Finding Purpose

Adapting to change is an essential part of aging well. Parker has had to give up some of her favorite activities, like tennis, and now uses a walker. Yet, she continues to find joy in spending time with family, tending to her yard, and participating in local events. Burnight explains that those who age well are often the ones who accept and even embrace change rather than resist it.

Research shows that how we perceive aging can influence our actual aging process. People who believe that aging is a time of growth tend to live longer than those who see it as a period of decline. Burnight encourages individuals to focus on what they can give rather than what they lose. Acts of giving, whether through volunteering, helping others, or simply offering support, can bring a deep sense of purpose and fulfillment.

Small Steps Toward a Meaningful Life

Finding purpose doesn’t require grand gestures. It can be as simple as delivering a lemon from your tree to a friend or offering to watch someone’s children. Burnight believes that purpose is found in daily decisions—choosing to use the fact that you are alive to make a difference in the world.

Whether you’re just starting out or have already entered your golden years, there are always ways to enrich your life. By staying active, building connections, and embracing change, you can create a fulfilling and joyful later life.