Summer's Dark Side: Families Struggle with Domestic Violence Amidst the Sunshine

Summer is here! With two kids very ready for vacation and my husband and I ready to kick off our summer relaxation plans, we are so excited for what the summer would bring. But not everyone gets to experience that feeling of excitement, relaxation and summer love.

As temperatures begin to rise and many head to pools and lakes to cool off, there is a rise of a different kind - a rise in domestic violence cases and calls to hotlines and shelter services like Centre Safe.

According to a survey prepared by the U.S Department of Justice, "Seasonal Patterns in Criminal Victimization Trends," intimate partner violence increases by 12% in the summer months compared to other seasons.

Some factors that come into play are:

• Increased stress due to summer break for children

• Increased temperatures

• Lack of activities and increased idle time for teens

• Increase of alcohol and drug intake

While those factors may contribute to abuse, they are not causes of domestic violence and should not shift blame away from perpetrators or excuse the harmful, toxic behavior of those causing harm.

We may imagine family units as most impacted by domestic violence. But did you know teenagers are a major group affected by domestic violence in the summer? With an increase in parties, drinking and idle time, teen dating violence becomes a horrible outcome. The Department of Justice also states that women ages 16 to 24 are at the highest risk of becoming victims of domestic violence. Teen dating violence is any form of abuse that takes place in a relationship including physical, sexual, mental or emotional. These can have serious effects on future relationships for developing teens.

For parents with teens, here are tips on how to reduce the probability of your teen experiencing dating abuse:

• Monitor social media sites

• Communicate often about healthy relationships to your teen

• Do not be afraid to ask questions and have an open dialogue with your teen

With one in three women and one in four men in a violent domestic relationship, it is possible that you or someone you care about is one of these victims. Many people struggle with the fact that a victim may not leave their abuser at all or leave right away. In fact, a victim often leaves and returns to the abuser seven times before leaving for good. While it may seem like a simple decision to those outside the relationship, victims of abuse often face multiple barriers to leaving, including:

• Financial dependence

• Desire to keep family together

• Hope that the abuse will stop

• Pressure from family

• Denial

• Shame

• Lack of resources

• Fear

Many people believe that victims of domestic violence will be safe once they separate from the abusers. They also believe that victims are free to leave abusers at any time. However, leaving does not usually put an end to violence. Abusers often escalate their violence to coerce a victim into reconciliation or to retaliate for the victim's rejection or abandonment of the abuser.

Abusers who believe they are entitled to a relationship with victims or that they "own" their partners view a victim leaving as the ultimate betrayal and will likely retaliate. Because of this, leaving an abusive relationship can be an extremely dangerous time. Individuals are most likely to be murdered when attempting to report abuse or leave an abusive relationship.

This does not mean victims should stay. Living with an abuser is highly dangerous because the violence usually escalates and becomes more frequent over time. However, if a victim is planning to leave, safety planning is extremely important . Advocates from Centre Safe can discuss with victims whatever they are comfortable discussing, including how to leave as safely as possible, develop a safety plan for themselves and any children involved, and options for protection from abuse orders and other tools/resources. No one deserves to be hurt in any way, and no victim is ever to blame for the abuse inflicted upon them by another person.

Jennifer Pencek is the executive director of Centre Safe. If you are experiencing intimate partner violence, sexual assault or stalking and would like to speak with a confidential, trained advocate, please consider calling Centre Safe's 24/7 hotline toll-free at 877-234-5050 or visit us online www.centresafe.org . The latest local, national and international news delivered every weekday morning.